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收录Steven Wright的全部英语名言第2页

作者：Steven Wright [全部名言]

共 41 条名言

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“Curiosity killed the cat, but for awhile I was a suspect.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“there's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“You know how it is when you go to be the subject of a psychology experiment, and nobody else shows up, and you think maybe that's part of the experiment? I'm like that all the time.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“My girlfriend sleeps in a queen-sized bed and I sleep in a court jester-sized bed.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I have the worlds largest seashell collection. You may have seen it, I keep it spread out on beaches all over the world.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“They say the sun never sets over the British Empire, but it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“If dracula can't see his reflection in the mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?”

— Steven Wright · No category

“Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious!”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I just bought a microwave fireplace. You can spend an evening in front of it in only eight minutes.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I bought some powdered water yesterday. I don't know what to add.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“Cross-country skiing is great if you live in a small country.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it's going to be up all night.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“Every now and then I like to lean out my window, look up and smile for a satellite picture.”

— Steven Wright · No category

“Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second.”

— Steven Wright · No category