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收录George Carlin的全部英语名言

作者：George Carlin  [全部名言]

共 33 条名言

✍️ 全部作者 (3,067) 📂 全部分类 (249)
“Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.”
— George Carlin  ·  Weather
“I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Life.....is a series of dogs.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your money called a broker?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
— George Carlin  ·  No category
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