"Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, And that's what parents were created for."

"The Preacher, the Politicain, the Teacher, Were each of them once a kiddie. A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature. Do I want one? God Forbiddie!"

"Progress might have been all right once but it has gone on too long."

"He without benefit of scruples His fun and money soon quadruples."

"People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it."

"Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny -Did you ever try buying them without money?"

"We never shall have any more time we have, and we have always had, all the time there is."

"He who says, 'Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,' has not been hit by a dictionary."

"Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's; and unto God the things that are God's; and unto human beings, what?"

"To ask advice is in nine cases out of ten to tout for flattery."

"Don't fight a battle if you don't gain anything by winning."

"She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake."