"Malice sucks up the greater part of her own venom, and poisons herself."

"I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly."

"No man is exempt from saying silly things; the mischief is to say them deliberately."

"When all is summed up, a man never speaks of himself without loss; his accusations of himself are always believed; his praises never."

"Even on the highest throne in the world, we are still sitting on our ass."

"There is as much difference between us and ourselves as there is between us and others."

"You cannot step twice into the same river."

"Truth, after all, wears a different face to everybody, and it would be too tedious to wait till all were agreed."

"I never trust a man unless I've got his pecker in my pocket."

"In Mexico we have a word for sushi: Bait."

"Being able to support oneself allows one to choose a marriage out of love and not just economic dependence. It also allows one to risk that marriage."

"There are two things in particular that it [the computer industry] failed to foresee: one was the coming of the Internet(...,0); the other was the fact that the century would end."