"Pause you who read this, and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day."

"Accidents will occur in the best regulated families."

"It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to, than I have ever known."

"A man who could build a church, as one may say, by squinting at a sheet of paper."

"It is a far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known."

"Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery."

"Great artists have no country."

"Straight men need to be emasculated. I'm sorry. They all need to be slapped around. Women have been kept down for too long. Every straight guy should have a man's tongue in his mouth at least once."

"Praise from the common people is generally false, and rather follows the vain than the virtuous."

"I cannot sleep unless I am surrounded by books."

"For every prohibition you create you also create an underground."

"GRAMMAR, n. A system of pitfalls thoughtfully prepared for the feet for the self-made man, along the path by which he advances to distinction."